Epiphany

Yesterday I had a "spread your wings and fly" epiphany.  As I was writing a blog post at My Fairy Wings Boutique blog, I remembered something I had written on a personal journal I used to keep:

"Life is too short to ignore what you do with it.  Be passionate, be creative, but above all, be true to yourself."

When I wrote this line, I was going through a very deep depression.  Nothing in my life at that moment made sense, and this was a desperate call for me to step up and do something about it.  Two years later, I am surrounded by completely new circumstances: a new relationship, a new sense of being, a new address, even a new haircut.  Too much new is good, but it can be a little bit scary sometimes.  The familiarity of everything else is gone.  I have to mark new safe zones, new comforts.  Leave behind old ways of doing, and rebirth into this new version of myself.  I am making progress.  Slowly but surely.

I do know that life is short.  Time passes by like a soft wind against your face, fading away almost exactly as it first presented itself.  So, everything you do now counts.  Everything.  Every laughter, every kiss, every idea, your creative being, the effort you put into your projects, your dreams, everything.

My father died last November (check out the link to see his picture).  I took this picture exactly one year before his death, on a Thanksgiving weekend in 2008. We spent that sunset playing with my new camera, learning the tricks, practicing against the marvelous sky.  He was the only one who got it.  He was the only one that would take the time to do photography with me.  No one else cared enough.  That extra time, that little project of ours, made a difference in my life.  And he made sure it counted for something great.  So, as I try on making a business in photography, I think so much of him.  In all the things I wish I could ask him now.  But his time came, and he gave me exactly what I needed, when I needed it.

All I have to do now is believe I can do it.  Believe and put all my effort into becoming it a reality.  This is only the beginning.