What's holding you back?

Inertia is by definition:
a property of matter by which it continues in its existing state of rest or uniform motion in a straight line, unless that state is changed by an external force.

We are matter.  Mutable, transforming, and ever changing matter.  Inertia applies to the physics of our realities.  Our bodies will move or will stay affixed unless an external force provokes the change of either setting in motion or stopping flat.

If you've been reading my blog, you know that I am a strong believer of change.  Nothing will happen if something doesn't happen first.  I have been going through a profound personal metamorphosis, allowing myself for the first time to explore my creative side and grow as a photographer.  While inertia is doing its thing, I am finding myself being held back by forces that I am not yet aware of.   These need to be revealed in order for me to free and continue the natural process of growth.

Our thoughts can become allies or foes in our own personal quest for growth.  Feelings of guilt, failure or frustration all come from what I call "the grey zone" thoughts.  For me it's a place where I don't take a stand.  In my mind I decide to go with the flow of things, to see where will I fit, instead of standing firm on my convictions and fight for the kind of future that I want.  It's when I don't say yes or no, but rather maybe, let's see.  I hate it. I really do, but it's a comfort zone for me, so I get to that state of mind pretty easily.  Nothing happens in the grey zone.  It's a constant back and forth that rocks me in the same spot.  It kind of shakes my ground, but it doesn't propel me into the next move I need to make.

These thoughts are the forces holding me back.  I know it, but this is the first time I understand it.  We are our thoughts.  They are the invisible force that makes our matter to change from its original state. I choose to take a stand, and separate the grey from my future.  I know what I want, and I am going for it.

Asking the right questions

There is a moment in life when one should stop everything and stare right back at oneself.  Look at you.  Look at who you are, where are you standing, your surroundings.  Acknowledge everything about you, your sadness, your joy, your restlessness... what moves you and what stops you flat.

In that moment, in that precise second, ask.  Talk to yourself and find out that thing, the splinter that's holding you back.  Look for the burning sensation on the mouth of your stomach, dare to dig that place that you've put aside, where you hide the leftovers of your busy life, and ask.  The questions are personal, and they will reveal themselves to you.  Look for them, embrace them, and them start the transformation.

Be prepared.  This exercise is the beginning of it all.  When we ask the right questions, a revolution starts within our soul.  These questions are the fuel needed for progress, for evolution.  They remove the rust on our brain and challenge us in limitless ways.

Life should not be a series of accidents.  Take charge, and believe.

Good Morning, Christmas Time :)

My mom came to visit for the holidays.  Yesterday we brought her to our apartment and she stayed the whole afternoon with us, drinking wine and eating pizza.  This is the second time my sweetheart actually met with her, and I think they're starting to know each other better.  We talked about everything and anything that came across, including memories of my father and my childhood back home.  It's good to have her here for the Holidays.  She is my Christmas.  Music and good food have always been present in my life thanks to her.  She brought all the warm memories of happy childhood times with her, and I thank her for that.

P.S.This is the cup of coffee I was telling you about in my previous post.  You see what I mean? ;)

With a cup of coffee...

I got up this morning so cold, that I rushed into the kitchen and made myself a warm and yummy cup of coffee.  Us latin girls like our coffee with milk and sugar.  Steamy and comforting.

So, it is with this hot treat that I come to write.  Writing always has a way with my mind: it quiets it down.  I'm in a constant conversation with myself, and I often think this is the reason why I loose so much hair. My hair falls down like quiet snow does on a winter night.  No, I'm not bald, but I do loose more hair than I know is normal. 

My photography has been on hold for a month now.  I went on a little trip with my sweetheart to NYC.  I know New York pretty well, so I offered my tour guide services to him and he accepted.  We walked and walked like two crazy people! And even though I've been to this city so many times, just being there with him made it so much different.  I had my birthday on a cruise by the Hudson River.  The sun set while we were on it and the city looked amazing.  The lights, the Brooklyn Bridge, the Empire State Bldg.... all those places looked so new to me from that perspective.  Sometimes we think we know everything later to find out that we don't.  I think that's about true with everything.  Think hard and you'll know what I'm talking about.

With November gone, December came with all the cold in the world.  We were happy we were able to leave the North before all the snow started to fall.  But oh, it's been 30 degrees in Miami! That's crazy, I know.  I'm enjoying it while it lasts.  With my warm cup of coffee, I'll be able to beat the cold over and over again.

December Blues

The end of the year.  The end of a long, confusing and hectic year.

I'm not complaining.  On the contrary, I am hopeful.  Year end always puts me in a meditative trance, like a buddhist monk in a constant state of meditation.  Reviewing, rewinding my memory and cleaning the dust that comes out from it.  We are the net result of the cumulative effect of our decisions, of our rights and wrongs.  It's ok, I can deal with my wrongs alright.  Let's just move along, shall we?

And that's what year end is all about... moving along.  Stepping into new ground and smelling the fresh grass underneath our feet.  Hopeful. At ease.  Content.  In peace.

Life and Soap

I have come to the conclusion that life is like soap.

Every single decision counts. The ingredients, the stuff its made of, is critically important. Extra care must be exercised when deciding what stays and what goes. Career choices, partnerships, living arrangements, likes, dislikes.... it all winds up in the enormous pot that is your heart, waiting to be mixed. If, for some reason, we rush into this selection, the consistency of the mixture does't flow. Is not right. But in reality, the true test of the ingredients comes with the lye.

The lye's job is to break down the ingredients. It melts them and transforms them into a completely new and unique element. It bounds the ingredients to such degree, that they no longer represent their original state. And so it is with life too. As we grow older, relationships bound us, tide us, and leave profound marks. When we get closer to the heat of tests, our souls transform into something we didn't know we were. And all we are left with is patience. Waiting. Letting things settle, and hope that the soap sets.

It is at this point when we decide if the choices were correct. If we got it right in the first try, or if we need to make adjustments. Go back to the ingredients and shuffle things one more time, and try again. This is the true craft of soapmaking. And I believe it is a craft that lasts a lifetime.

We will end up with a soap in our hands. We will enter our own space, in the bath, our own quiet time, and we will try the soap. It is there, you alone with the soap, where you will enjoy the results and smile. In the end, the smile is what matters. The true satisfaction of a well lived life accompanied by the small luxury of a good handmade soap.